Keeping On

Picture via the New York Times

My husband's family has been saying goodbye to one of its dear loved ones this fall.  The jury's still out, my brother-in-law might pull through but the doctors say otherwise. 

Life has a way of pausing when you are in the hospital, while the hustle and bustle of our lives outside continues.  It's made it hard for me to do much besides the very basics and asking Dr. Google lots of very scary questions. Calls don't get returned, plans are cancelled, and blogs go unwritten for weeks.

I've wondered how we will celebrate the holidays given all of this uncertainty.  But we have a really happy little one that demands smiles, and dancing, and joy.

So just like that, we are doing the holidays.  Thanksgiving dinner is arranged, Christmas tickets have been purchased, and to-do lists are getting done.  We are all hoping the holiday season will lift our spirits, and help us to build some new happy memories to counteract the sad ones.

How do you stay positive during times of uncertainty?

Oh the Humanity (Humans of New York)

Do you follow Humans of New York on Facebook or Tumblr?  If you don't, you should check it out.

For those of you that don't know about it, Humans of New York is a photoblog of street portraits featuring everyday New Yorkers.  It StoryCorps in photos.

I love the posts because they remind me that everyone has a story and that you never know what the person standing next to you is going through.  Some of the posts make me laugh and others get me teary eyed.

Did I mention this project was so successful the photographer, Brandon Stanton, turned it into a book?

Here are some of my favorites:

How to Hire and Pay your Child's Caregiver

If you live in the Washington Metro area, I don't need to tell you how difficult it is to find child care for children under 3. I also don't need to tell you how expensive it is.

In our case, I called three different day care centers the morning I found out I was pregnant. The waitlist for each location would extend far beyond my maternity leave.  This mean that I knew that I would have to seek out alternatives to a group child care setting (nanny share, home day care, in-home nanny).  After taking into account our different needs, my husband and I decided to hire a nanny. 

We soon learned that finding and securing in-home childcare is a bit more difficult than going the day care route.  You are responsible for making sure your child is in the care of a trustworthy and dependable person.  You also have to take on the responsibilities that other employers have which means that you need to set up your own systems so that you can properly manage this employee. 

Here is a guide that I put together based on my experiences of hiring and employing our nanny.   

The Pumping Project (My Pumping Story)

Pumping in front of the Eiffel Tower with a hospital grade pump (NBD).  Photo via Rookie Moms

Rookie Mom's is trying to make pumping an accepted daily activity through its Mom's Pumping Project. They also want the world to see the craziness many Moms endure by encouraging us to upload our pumping photos with the hashtags #rookiemoms #pumpingproject.

The Pumping Project came about two months too late for me to post my own photos. And, I would've had some awesome photos to share with you all. 

On the Pulse of the Morning (Maya Angelou)

Maya Angelou passed away yesterday.

I remember listening to Maya Angelou read her poem, "On the Pulse of the Morning," during President Clinton's first inauguration. I watched it in Mrs. Levy's American History class. Sure I was interested in the inauguration, but I was also happy to have over an hour to tune-out and finish up some homework.

That was until Maya Angelou woke me up. She read her beautiful poem about America's history. In less then six minutes, Ms. Angelou rocked my world. I thought about that poem for days and that weekend I found my way to Books and Books where I bought a copy of I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings.

Thank you Ms. Angelou, for inspiring my teenage soul, for writing great books, for making great poetry, and for leading an amazing life.

Godspeed. 

Happy Birthday to Me (The Best Birthday Gifts!)

 

This weekend we drove up to New England for my husband's college reunion.  It was our first extended road trip as a family of three, and I would say it was a success. 

 

My birthday also fell on the long weekend.  Since we were travelling we decided to hold off on any big celebrations until we returned from our trip.   

 

The Drama Free Friendship Manifesto



Cartoon by Gemma Correll

Have you seen THIS blog post from Renegade Mothering.  I must say it is quite a complicated manifesto for the simple message it is trying to convey:  cut your friends some slack because we all flake out.

So here's my friendship mantra:

The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. We all have our own struggles and I trust that we all do the best with what we have.  Sometimes life gets in the way. Don't worry about it, because I know we will both be there for each other when it really counts. I'm committed to cutting you some slack.  Hopefully you can do the same for me. 

Do you have words that you live by?  How have your friendships changed in recent years?

The Gap's Miami Collection (Serious Nostalgia)

Jacket/Shirt/Shoes/Jeans/Bracelets/Bag/Glasses/Watch

Have you checked out the Gap's Miami Collection?  It really captures the essence of Miami circa the late 80's/early 90's. 

Happy Friday! (May 2, 2014)

DC Artist Jean Maisel's painting on display at the Phillips Gallery

This weekend is the White House Correspondents Dinner.  Get excited to see celebrities descend on our nation's capitol. If you can't make the dinner itself, the event has morphed into a 5 day fiesta so hopefully there's something for everyone that wants to partake in the fun. 

It's sundress season, can someone please take me shopping this minute?

Aimee Mann and Ted Leo perform at the 9:30 club this Friday.  I won't be there :(.

But I will be going to the Strathmore to see Maa Baa Neigh part of the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra's Music Box Series, for children between between 6 months and 3 years old and their chaparones.

Last chance to check out DC Artist, Jean Maisel's exhibit at the Phillips Gallery. 

Let's go ride a bike! A bunch of women are meeting up Sunday Morning at Jones Park in Alexandria for a bike ride called Women on a Roll. 

A Wall Street Journal article saying that DC is the most expensive city in the country, or is it?

A great piece from NPR on Nokia's unforgettable ringtone.

And links to some of this week's posts:

• A Mother's Day Gift Guide
• Mother's Day Tablescapes
• Changing Demographics in DC

Our Changing District (The Urban Institute's Microtrend Series)

Have you checked out the Urban Institutes's series on Washington DC called Our Changing City? It's super interesting for the on again off again data nerd that I am.

Bye Bye Palena (Cleveland Park Boogaloo)

A quick snap of Palena late Saturday night before it shuttered.

Palena, my favorite neighborhood destination, closed on Saturday. 

Palena's end seemed to have come quite suddenly.  Neighbors found out the restaurant was experiencing serious trouble through a report in the Washington City Paper. Then on Friday, Palena's owner, Frank Ruta, announced that he would be closing the restaurant on Saturday night.  It is my understanding that the employees didn't find out much sooner than the rest of us and were equally taken by surprise. 

Restaurants come and go, but Palena's shuttering has left me quite surprised and wistful. It's clear that I'm not the only one who feels such strong feelings about Palena's closing. 

Given more time to digest the news, I can't help but wonder if the community would have tried to do something to save Palena. If folks had known earlier about its difficulties paying rent, I bet that someone would have suggested a Kickstarter campaign.  Or maybe the neighborhood could have banded together like in, Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo. But Breakin 3: Cleveland Park Boogaloo has yet to be produced, and we were left with one day to say goodbye to our Palena. (The clip below can't be seen on a mobile format.)

George Clooney is Getting Married (Who's that Lady)

George Clooney is getting married to the gorgeous, successful, tri-lingual, Oxford-educated Amal Alamuddin.  Or as Slate puts it London Human Rights Lawyer Amal Alamuddin Is Engaged!

I must say I'm excited by this.  George Clooney, the superstar that everyone thought would remain single, is settling down with what looks like a no-nonsence, interesting, engaging, career oriented person.  As an added plus, she's stylish, and gorgeous.  I can't wait to hear more about this couple!

Happy (belated) Earth Day (Renew and Reuse)

Happy (belated) Earth Day People! 

I planned on doing this post yesterday for Earth Day, but I've been tending to a sick child and husband. But, Earth Day is everyday.

One of the best ways to help the environment is by consuming less.  Children's stuff becomes obsolete to your little one in no time, so buying second-hand items for your kids is really a no-brainer. 

When I was preparing for the arrival of my little one I acquired a lot of her items second-hand.  For Earth Day I wanted to post a list of places where I had luck finding second hand baby items.

Where have you found second-hand items for your little one?  

Urban Family Dwelling

Did you see this article in the New York Times about increasing family sizes in New York City?  The trend is mostly related to dual income families in the upper tax brackets.  Families that a few years ago might have gone to the suburbs after the second child was born. 

There is a lot to this article.  The idea that a third child is viewed as a status symbol.  The fact that people with the means are choosing the convenience of living in the city over having more space and perhaps better schools in the suburbs. 

I don't live in Manhattan but I do live in the fairly urban city of Washington.  My husband and I have decided that we want to live in an urban area that is walking distance to the metro.  We like walking around our neighborhood and we like the freedom of being able to get to other places relatively quickly. 

One of the mothers interviewed in the article mentioned that staying in Manhattan allowed her to maintain her career.  This is something that I also thought about when we were deciding where to live after I learned I was pregnant.  I really felt that if we moved too far away from Washington, the commute would make working and mothering all the more complicated. 

I  feel fortunate we could make this decision because I like living close to work.  I can make a quick trip home in the middle of the day if my daughter is sick or if I want to go with her to story-time during my lunch hour.  The trade-off is that we live in a smaller space, pay higher taxes, and schooling is a little bit up in the air.  But for us these trade-offs are worth it. One wonders about those who can't afford to stay in the city and have to commute hours to and from work in addition to caring for their families. 

What factors did you consider when you were deciding where to live after you had children?

The Cherry Cast

Drawing obtained via Washington Post

Happy Monday.  Researchers at the University of Washington and Korea have predicted that this year's peak bloom date for Cherry Blossoms is April 10 otherwise known as this Thursday.

The Washington Post has a great page that aggregates all the photos of Cherry Blossoms in the region.  You see, you don't have to brave the crowds at the Tidal Basin to see these pretty blossoms.  It sure is a fun thing to do though.

Here's a link to all the Cherry Blossom Festival activities. The festival ends April 13th, but hopefully the blossoms will endure for a little while longer. 

If a Tree Falls in the Woods (On Losing My Facebook Account)

I took this really cute photo of my daughter in a Bucky Badger hat and a red sweatsuit.  She was cheering the Wisconsin Badgers onto victory against the American University Eagles.  The Badgers won!  You probably know about the victory but chances are you don't know about the adorable photo because I no longer have access to my Facebook account. 

Facebook deactivated my account on March 18.  On that morning I tried to log into my account and a message popped up that it had been deactivated for violating Facebook's terms of service.  Since then, I have tried to contact Facebook repeatedly.  In spite of my attempts to contact Facebook, I still don't have my access to my account and I still don't know why my account was disabled.

Losing my Facebook account has been a bit of an existential crisis for me.  For the past six years www.Facebook.com/karolina (yes I was able to snag a wonderful URL) was the place where I interacted with friends, family, and colleagues.   It was where I announced my move to Washington, my engagement, and the birth of my daughter.  It is also the place where I put up carefully curated photos of family gatherings, my wedding, and most recently my daughter's first year. I've lost access to all my contacts and to these photographs.  At one fell swoop I lost the equivalent of my Rolodex, my most treasured photos, my email address, my telephone line, and my hard drive. 

So if your Facebook Account is deactivated, does anyone notice?  I can't create a status update to say, "Annoying day Facebook disabled my account."  I could tell the few friends I still google chat with or text, but my Facebook acquaintances probably just think I gave Facebook up for Lent.  Hopefully Facebook will come to it senses and give me my account back before then. 

A friend of mine from college (AKA my college boyfriend's roommate) went through a different but still aggravating Facebook problem and wrote about it HERE.  He's actually a paid writing professional (writer) so you will probably enjoy reading about his woes more than mine.

Have you lost your Facebook Account? If so, how did you get it back?

March Challenge (Drop Everything and Read)

March Challenge AKA HandlewithKaro's bookclub.

So my breakfast challenge last month was a success. Sure, I had one week that was a total fail, but it got me on the right track and now I'm eating breakfast at home out of habit.

This month, my goal is to read one book a week.  I've barely cracked a book since baby girl came to town, and I no longer want to use having a baby as an excuse for letting my brain turn to mush. I'm planning to read memoirs and other easy breezy books, because I'm not quite ready to read Tolstoy or Joyce just yet.

Last week I read Susana Sonnenberg's, memoir about friendships, She Matters. The short synopsis is: this book is like High Fidelity only it's about friendships between women, it is darker and it doesn't really have coherent start to finish.   Susan Chira wrote a wonderful review of the book in the New York Times (LINK). The longer synopsis is after the jump.

The Oscars (Lupita and Jordan Win the Oscars)

What I really mean is that Lupita won the Oscars. But Jared Leto also wins because I've been swooning over him for more than 20 years (even with that hair).

But let's get back to Lupita. Her performance in Twelve Years a Slave was beyond.  Her acceptance speech was so heartfelt and beautiful.  And now for some frivolity, she looked exquisite in her baby blue Prada dress.  Lupita you are one incredible woman!

I also have to give a round of applause to Lupita's younger brother Peter.  What younger brother would not have seized that opportunity to photobomb at the Oscars or anywhere else for that matter? I want to spend Christmas with this family.

February Challenge: Week 2 (Life Gets in the Way)

Life:1 February Challenge:0

That just about sums things up.  We were living in a hotel this week and the snow has delayed our return home.  

Since I could not make myself breakfast I agreed that I would eat things like oatmeal, fruit, and hard boiled eggs.  My initial thoughts about spending a week in a hotel were: room service, a freshly made bed every morning, gym and pool at the ready.  I didn't factor in that a certain seven-month old would not enjoy hotel living.

And because I was sleep deprived I "deserved" cherry ricotta pancakes, baked apple and lemon pancakes, eggs Florentine (with extra sauce).  So there you have it.  My week in regression.  Here is to a better week next week.

February Challenge

This year, I'm trying to challenge to develop better habits each month.  While I hope to meet each challenge 100% perfection is not the goal.  The goal is to try to do better.  

This month I've challenged myself to eating breakfast at home every weekday.  Weekends will not be part of this challenge because brunch is my favorite meal, and also because having a six month old means that daytime socializing is where it is at. In the mornings I'm in a rush I find myself going to Starbucks or my building cafeteria to get fueled up.  I rarely make a healthy choice and I always end up spending more money than I would if I stayed at home.

I did pretty well this week considering it was the busiest week since I returned from maternity leave.  I bought a bagel on Thursday morning and considering my track record these past few months I consider that to be a victory.

What types of good habits would you like to embrace?